Saturday, September 13, 2008

Creating Effective and Efficient Relationships

Relationships of all kinds are often perceived as very delicate things, that require extra effort to maintain. However, a relationship can also be something that can provide security and can also be long lasting despite many trials.

Building an effective and lasting relationships is a necessity for several reasons. For example in a group or organization, the well being of the people depends on how efficient and effective that group or organization works.

The group or organization is also dependent on how the members work well with the management.

An ineffective group or organization can really be very frustrating. An effective group or organization can also ask so much on their members, that sometimes the members would be having no life outside the walls of the area where they work or sacrifice the other aspects of their life just to meet deadlines. For an organization or group with this kind of scenario, relationships can be stressed or suffer from breakdown.

People or other entities who depend on these groups or organization also suffer.

Society is defined as a web of relationships, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested, can make society work better. In this way each member works for the good of the whole and towards achieving a common goal. This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships.

Understanding the other parties' feeling and position creates an effective and efficient relationship. The easiest method to understand what is important to another party is to ask them what they want and listen to what they have to say. When the other party realizes this, they would feel the importance given to them

Effective and efficient relationships require parties to openly express their feelings and positions on all matters pertinent on the relationship. Assuming that the other party understands our needs and give us when we need it without asking for it is not a good practice.

Respect is the key to relationship. In order to create a more effective relationship, parties should treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to the other party and by trying sincerely to understand how they function. You can also show respect to other parties by confirming that they are doing everything they can.

The opposite of respect is quick forming of judgments based on unfounded facts and prejudice.

Respect is the very foundation for a great relationship. This also means respecting yourself and respecting others.

Another key area in forming an effective relationship is to tackle differences of the other party directly. Differences between parties or people are quite interesting. For example in a conversation where each party listens to the other party, you may observe that each is having two different perspectives.

Work towards a win-win solution for both parties.

This can be done when at least one party acknowledges that the relationship is important. That party would then exert more time, effort and energy to understand the other party's needs and deal with it to get it out of the way. Should they fail, it is comforting for that party to know that they tried.

Effectively listening and no pre-judging. This is important if parties are to understand each other.

Informal discussions are conducive for parties. They bring out issues and concerns comfortably. They also feel more relaxed making them think more clearly.

Developing an atmosphere where the other party can express their feelings when they need to.

When parties fail to express whatever is on their mind or their feelings, it can get in the way of building an effective relationship.

Parties should be aware that certain things exist naturally but should be controlled in any dealings in any relationship. Human nature is one. Some of these things found in a relationship also include a history of stereotyping or mistrust, blaming the other person or party for a strained relationship, excluding the other party's feelings when focusing on a task, no clear and defined objectives, roles and expectations of each party in a relationship is also unclear.

Relationships are important to anyone, addressing issues and problems right away is a must to further improve the relationship. As they say 'No man is an Island'.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Virtual Dating

Virtual dating is a common method of dating with
people who are wired in the technology realm. This
method of dating is a system for finding possible
dates or people who you might be interested in dating.

Virtual dating uses a combined method of playing video
games and dating. People will create what is known as
avatars that are virtual figures of themselves. They
will spend time in a video game virtual world and meet
other people over the computer.

This virtual dating method allows people to talk to
potential dates through conversation and interact with
each other through a video game method.

If they decide they want to have an actual
relationship with the other person then they will move
to the next step in actually meeting by exchanging
phone numbers or setting up a location to meet.

Millions of people practice virtual dating today and
it is a preferred method by many. These people who use
these systems are usually into science fiction and
they are very good with technology.

The technology and the use of the virtual dating
system shows people using this system of dating that
they have something in common.

However, with the allowed interaction and the play
through the video game method allows people to
interact in a virtual way with people too. This can
show someone’s intellectual side, education, and more
when they work through the virtual dating systems.

Virtual dating is a common method today used by people
to meet new people and find potential candidates for
pursuing a relationship with. It is a fun way to meet
new people and allow them to get to know you without
actually meeting them until you are comfortable.

Speed Dating

Speed dating occurs when people go to a speed dating
place looking for someone who might be a good match
for them. This includes a very quick meeting with many
different people and you see if there is someone there
who you might be compatible with.

Speed dating is when many women and men sit at tables.
A woman and a man will sit at each table for a
specified period of time. It may be two minutes or ten
minutes depending on the speed dating place you are
at.

During this period of time, the two will ask each
other questions and get to know a little about each
other. They have the opportunity to quickly get a run
down on each person and decide if they are someone
they might be interested in getting to know a little
better after.

When the time is up then the women or the men will
move to the next table and talk to another person.

After each of the couples have met and spoke to each
other they will give the numbers of the people or say
which people they are interested in. If both people
show an interest then they have the opportunity to
communicate and go out together.

During the speed dating process while couples are at
the table they may exchange information with each
other also, if they hit it off right away.

Speed dating is not for everyone but some people
really like meeting new people and finding a date this
way. Many people like this method because they get to
meet the people in person and talk with them rather
than online or by going on a blind date.

It is said that if there is chemistry between the two
people then it is immediately recognized during a
speed dating session.

Regular Dating

Regular dating is the most popular type of dating.
This is because most people like the intimacy of being
alone with their significant other.

Regular dating is going out with your date alone
without other people coming along. Many people like to
include dinner and something to do afterwards like the
theatre, a concert, or dancing.

Everyone has a different idea of what they believe is
romantic. Dinner might be at a fine dining restaurant
and the two of you will get dressed up. Some people
consider a home cooked meal by candlelight dinner the
romantic way to dine on a date.

This can be the best way to go if you don’t have a lot
of money to go out but you want to do something
special. In addition, when you cook a meal for your
date there is more thought and effort put into it and
some people enjoy it much more than they do being
treated to a fine restaurant.

The regular dating experience gives you the
opportunity to get to know your date on a more
personal level than when you are out with other
people.

You can spend the evening talking and enjoying each
other. If you are not comfortable with an intimate
dating experience on the first date then you might not
want to go alone on the first date. You might consider
a double or a group date.

Regular dating gives you the opportunity to get to
know your date on a personal level. Usually, a regular
date will consist of lunch or dinner together and
finding something to do afterwards. Regular dating is
the preferred method of dating for most people because
of the attention and the intimacy.

Problems With Dating

Most dating problems occur because either the two of
you are not compatible or you are not communicating
enough. Other problems may be because the two of you
just are not right for each other.

Communication is the most important thing when you are
dating. Most problems occur because the two of you are
having difficulty expressing your feelings or you
aren’t being clear about what you want.

When you both communicate with each other properly it
is clear to both of you if you are compatible and have
the same likes and dislikes.

You cannot force a relationship if the two of you are
too different or you have different goals for the
relationship.

It is important to communicate about what you need and
want from your relationship so you both are satisfied
and you are not having disagreements about things.

Another thing that can cause problems with dating is
if the two of you are not compatible. Communicating
properly will tell you if you are or not.

Compatibility can be difficult if one person in the
relationship is needier than the other person. If one
of the people wants their space and the other is very
needy then it can make it difficult for dating.

Dating problems occur when communication skills are
not up to par. You have to be comfortable with the
person you are with so you can talk to them.

Being comfortable and being able to communicate will
show you how compatible the two of you are. If you
don’t have these two things then you might just
consider a good friendship.

Online Dating

Online dating is very popular today with the advances
of technology and the increase of people who use
computers. Online dating is a system for organizing a
date and can be an excellent way to meet that special
someone.

Today, online dating is one of the most popular
systems for meeting someone new to go on a date with.

There are many online dating websites you can visit
and see people who are looking to meet someone new.
You can post your picture and create a profile on one
of them too.

This will allow you to tell everything about yourself.
This way, people can see if you enjoy the same types
of activities they do and you can see if certain
people look to be like someone you might be interested
in.

Online dating has proven to be a successful method for
meeting people and setting up dates. Many people have
continued their relationships and even been married
through online dating methods.

All relationships through online dating aren’t
successful but you may meet a new friend if you are
not compatible for dating.

When you consider online dating, it is important to
remember you need to be safe. The Internet is not
always what it seems and people are not always honest
with everything about themselves.

You should be sure when you go on your first online
date you are somewhere you feel comfortable with and
be sure to protect yourself at all times.

You can have a fantastic experience and meet your
perfect match but you don’t want to be a statistic
because you believed everything the other person said
on the Internet.

Long Distance Dating

Long distance relationships and dating occur when two
people live far apart from each other and are unable
to see each other but on holidays, weekends, or on
vacation.

Long distance dating can be very difficult for some
relationships if the people want to be together more
often. Some people enjoy long distance relationships
because it gives them the time apart from each other
to fully appreciate each other when they are able to
be together.

Some long-distance dating may not last a long because
they are too difficult or one of the people in the
relationship may end up moving closer so they can be
together.

When couples experience long distance dating they are
usually able to see each other on the weekends if the
distance isn’t too far apart.

If the couple is too far away to be able to see each
other on the weekends then they will use their
vacation time from work and see each other on the
holidays. Whenever they can get the time available
they will see each other.

Many people take advantage of airline miles and earn
free tickets to fly and see their significant other
when they are long-distance dating.

The couples are able to communicate by phone, email,
and other methods, but they can only see each other
when one of them are capable of traveling.

Long-distance dating can be difficult for some people
if they find they want to see more of the other person
and the distance is just too far.

However, it can be good for a relationship to have the
time apart because when they do see each other the two
are extremely happy to be together and they don’t take
each other’s time for granted.

Dutch Dating

Dutch dating means that each person will pay for
themselves when they go out on a date. This method of
dating is often the best when both parties are new to
each other, independent, or just friends.

Many people often like to go Dutch because they are
not comfortable with someone else paying for them.
This is common with women who are liberal or
independent in their thinking.

It is also common if funds are low for both parties.
Both people will split the costs of dinner and any
other activities chosen to do on the date.

They also might meet at the locations or drive
themselves so the other party isn’t responsible for
their transportation.

Dutch dating can be extremely casual and creates a
comfortable atmosphere many people are happy with when
a relationship is new.

Some people just aren’t comfortable with someone else
paying for anything for them until they get to know
them better. In addition, they don’t want to feel as
if they owe them for anything later.

Dutch allows the date to go in a successful manner
without the feelings of being ‘owed’. In addition,
many women understand the expenses associated with
dating and don’t believe it is fair that they guy
should pay for everything, especially if the two go to
an expensive restaurant and do something even more
expensive later.

Dutch dating is common for people who are not
comfortable with someone else spending money on them.

There are many liberal and independent women who are
very proud who prefer to pay their own way also. This
creates a comfortable atmosphere because no one feels
like they owe them for anything later.

Double Dating

Double dating is a fun way to go out and have a good
time with your significant other. It gives your date
the opportunity to meet your friends and it also can
provide a comfortable experience for someone who might
be a little nervous to go out on a one-on-one date
quite yet.

Double dating is an excellent idea if you want to meet
someone new and you aren’t quite comfortable with
being alone with them yet. You can invite a couple you
know to come along too.

This allows for you to be around people you are
comfortable with while you are getting to know your
date. Some people like to go on a double date first so
they are not so nervous on the first date.

Going on a double date also gives your date the
opportunity to get to know you through your friends.

It might be a good idea to invite a couple that will
say good things about you if you really like your date
and you want to see them again.

Your date can get a good idea with the type of person
you are by who you are hanging out with and the things
they say about you.

It is a really good way to get another perspective on
the person you are going out with or if you want your
date to know more about you.

Double dating provides a comfortable experience when
you don’t want to go out with your date alone but you
do want to get to know them.

In addition, double dating provides an excellent way
for you or your date to see how both of you interact
with your friends and get a different perspective.

Dating Etiquette

When you go on a date there are certain things and
ways you should behave. Of course you want the person
to get to know you so you shouldn’t try and be someone
that you are not.

When you go out on a date you should look and dress
nice. This will show the other person you care about
your appearance but you also care about what they
think about you. If you don’t care about what the
other person thinks then you probably shouldn’t be
going out on a date with them.

Depending on the person you are taking out you should
also remember to open the car doors and all doors for
your date.

If the woman you are going out with is a feminist,
then let her open the doors and do things for herself
or it will bother her. She also will want to pay for
her own meal.

If you are not going on a date with an independent
woman who is a feminist then you should open the
doors, be on time when you pick her up, and be
prepared to pay for the entire date.

Don’t take your date somewhere you cannot afford and
never find yourself asking your date for money to
cover the bill.

Dating etiquette also includes not making the other
person feel as if they are on an interview. It is
common for people on a date to ask many questions and
they just want to get to know the other person.

However, don’t make them feel as if they are on an
interview or you might scare them off. Be sure to
create a comfortable atmosphere.

Blind Dating

Blind dating is a common way for dating also. It often
occurs when someone is set up on a date through a
friend or a third party.

People are often set up on a blind date through a
friend or a co-worker who knows both parties and
believes they would make a great couple.

If you are recommended to go on a blind date by a
friend who knows you well, you might want to consider
it.

If your friend knows the other person as well as they
know you, they might be right about the two of you
connecting and getting along well together.

When you go on a blind date you might not have any
idea what the other person looks like or you might
have been shown a picture.

In all cases, the person you will be going out with
will be someone you have never met or spoke to before.
It is common to be nervous about going on a blind date
because you don’t know if the person will like you and
you don’t know if you will like the other person.

Some people really enjoy being set up on a blind date
and many blind dates turn into successful
relationships if the right people set the two of you
up.

You should try to know as much information that you
can about the person before you go and be sure your
friend knows the other person well before you go to be
sure the date will not be a disaster.

However, even if the two of you decide that you are
not a compatible couple you might meet someone who
becomes a very good friend of yours in the long run.

Friday, February 8, 2008

Dating After Divorce: Dating Tips For Boomers



Impressing someone can be really difficult.
Few important tips for getting connected with your desired hot dates are:
• Don’t be desperate to impress:

If you are trying to impress people with things which don’t go with your personality, then this would communicate insecurity on your part.

Talking about your wealth, job, car, achievements, etc. is also boring because this indirectly communicates that you have got nothing to talk about your personality as well as other things which create attraction.

Definitely, the things which are stated above are good but they should not be used for impressing others as it might have undesirable consequences. Hence, use your personality for impressing others for getting better results.

• Don’t Get Obsessed:

When you begin dating people, don’t get overly obsessed with some particular person. Think about meeting more number of dates for maximizing your chances of finding a match. This is required as not everyone will be serious enough about you to be calling anytime after the date.

Hence, have a laid back and fun game type approach towards this. People usually desire of meeting only one date with an expectation that the particular person will be the match that they are seeking. Instead of this, you should give yourself greater number of options by dating more than one person.

• Be Confident:

If you are looking at someone for admiring them, hold on to your confidence when they look into your eyes. You should also look straight into their eyes without giving the impression of a stare.

Continue till they break away this eye contact. You should never break away as it shows that you are not confident enough. Maintaining secret is a hugely important element of attraction magic. This also provides you with a way of hitting conversation with them.

For instance, you can accuse them that they were looking at you as if you were some Belgian chocolate. It’s different, it’s attractive and it’s fun, try it.

• Forget About Clues:

Experts advice us to look for cues which convey that someone is finding you attractive. For e.g. preening, crossing legs or pointing feet towards you, playing with hair, licking lips, etc.

All this is nonsense. If you really have a desire of impressing someone, use your communication and personality for creating attraction.

Being different from the other competitors is also essential. Waiting will get you nowhere.

If you really want someone, take the initiative for making it happen.

Dating After Divorce: Interracial Dating Tips



Interracial dating was considered a taboo in past days but it has become far more acceptable today. A huge number of dating services have been launched over the internet exclusively for interracial dating which has resulted in interracial dating’s fast growth.

Other than these websites, people wanting to date individuals of other race, nationality or ethnicity can also use personal ads for this purpose.

In fact, conducting advanced searches of these personal ads in famous dating websites over the internet will yield greater number of results providing information about singles wanting to date individuals of different ethnic origin than theirs for reasons such as casual or serious relationships, fulfilling a fetish or fantasy or simply having fun.

Statistics released by census bureau reveal that interracial relationships as well as marriages have increased rapidly.

But, a stigma still lingers over interracial dating even today due to the disapproval, be it imagined or real, by people important and close to us like family, co-workers and friends.

This stigma may be responsible for interracial dating’s growing popularity over the internet. Dating websites give you the liberty of searching individuals belonging to different ethnicity from your home’s privacy itself.

You also get to browse the ads or profiles of numerous suitable people. Hence, these websites play a major role in bringing together those people who have similar interests as well as minds.

Through these websites, you can specifically state what you desire. For e.g.
• Chinese man seeking black woman.
• White woman seeking Indian man.

Interracial dating has always been associated with relationship between a black single and a white single.

This reason behind this belief cannot be known. The way, in which interracial pornography is marketed by adult industry, it may be responsible for this. Interracial dating rather relates to all the ethnicities.

People looking for discreet relationships can especially benefit from these websites owing to its convenience and the liberty of remaining anonymous. This privacy is limited to the initial communication only. Interracial couples are required to meet for gauging each other in reality.

Hence, they should be prepared for facing occasional stares, whispering, backstabbing and jibes.

Interracial couples can think about meeting online for the purpose of arranging their meetings at some place away from family members and friends. Hence, couples can be open about sharing what can be expected.

These dating websites also provide matchmaking services aimed at people seeking marriage or long-term relationships. Posting your information at these websites is all that is needed.

Dating After Divorce: Advice For Men



Consider these hook-ups.
• Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore.
• Guy Ritchie and Madonna.

Now consider this.
• Your best friend and the aged English teacher of your high school.

Hey, don’t look surprised. This is possible. These days, older women can easily find a baby if they want.

You will always come across Traditional Tina who prefers older men having the same maturity level as hers and one who can provide for her needs. But, what about the ever-increasing population of crazy women having fanatical cradle-robbing behaviors?

Are these women similar to Maggie May, which according to Rod Stewart, will play havoc in your bed during night and then kick you over your head in mornings. Are these women a lonely desperado wanting to hook-up with gentler and kinder of young men? Few reasons behind this are:

• Not All Girls Want Father Figures:

Older men often assume a paternal and protective role towards women. But, this can be an absolute turn-off on the women’s part? Why? Because, they don’t need another father as they already have one. Women having executive jobs are used to looking after themselves.

They often have trouble playing the role of Helpless Heather during weekends or holidays as they don’t need Daddy Warbucks for looking after their tasks.

• Younger Guys Idealize Older And Successful Women:

Younger guys have a tendency of admiring the accomplishments of successful women, such as the corporate babes. These women feel great when starry-eyed young men admire and smile at them.

This sort of respect is rarely attained from older men. Young guys appreciate these women for having chased their dreams.

• Younger Men Give A Better Performance In Bed:

Ahh, life’s cruel irony once again. Remember having sex and thoroughly enjoying it with your girlfriend during college days? Well, the fraidy cat of those days has become a temptation tigress today.

Women’s testosterone levels start increasing during a certain age when men’s levels actually start plummeting.

This libido lift of a 30 to 40 year old woman makes her desires of getting busy even stronger while her male counterparts of similar age are busy investigating their eyelids’ inside. Is anything more required to be said?

• Women Love Metrosexual Males:

Today’s generation of young men is comfortable with talking about fingernails, toenails, exotic food, cosmetics, etc. and hence, older women who had spent their lives with some Archie Bunker types, find today’s men refreshing.

This is why women sometimes prefer dating younger men.

Dating After Divorce: Baby Boomer Singles



Does your date of birth lie in the period 1946-1964? The term Baby Boomers is used for referring to those singles that were born during this period. There are about 35 million of them.

Numerous conferences have been conducted for dealing with the concern related with the aging of America. The cultural changes which are affecting our demographics and statistics require us to properly analyze all the social agencies as well as public policies with different considerations and perspectives for finding a solution to this aging population problem.

The major challenge and opportunity facing today’s people is that they are expected to live much longer. Within a couple of decades, scientific discoveries and advanced medical technology will cause an unprecedented increase in the expected length of life.

Reaching the age of 100, or even 120 will become relatively normal. It has been estimated that about 1 million of these Boomers are expected to reach the age of probably, 100.

Few survival tips for these boomers for helping them in living longer are:
• Careful Selection Of Your Mate:

As you are expected to live longer, obviously you will be spending a lot of years with your spouse. Hence, it has become extremely important to get committed with only those people whom you truly love.

• Save Money!

Statistics suggest that Boomers are not really good money savers. More savings, planning and investments will be required on your part for having a healthy economic future. This also includes finding new career options.

• Consider Your Attitude:

We have always been a society which worships youth. Though some cultures do respect their older citizens, a huge number of elderly Americans can be found languishing in various nursing homes. They have been completely forgotten.

Think about what is your way of viewing old people. Search for admirable characteristics and qualities in them. This will help in developing a respectful attitude towards the elderly folks.

• Boomer Women Should Take Care Of Their Finances:

Boomer women may possibly have fewer earnings than men because of the time which they dedicated to their aging parents or children. Hence, their future economic security may be jeopardized. Hence, these women should try to reduce their spending for saving more.

• Become Tech-Savvy:

Boomers will have better resources for staying connected as well as informed as compared to the past retirees on account of the technology available today which provide a lot of choices.

So, are the Boomer singles ready for facing these challenges?

Dating After Divorce: For Baby Boomers



A huge number of Baby Boomers consider themselves as having the responsibility of setting a new trend. This is fabulous news as far as dating services over the internet and dating industry are concerned.

Reports given by Associated Press say that 50% of the people belonging to the 40-69 age groups are either separated or divorced whereas 30% of them are unmarried. Baby Boomers have increasingly turned towards the internet for speed dating or hooking up with someone for companionship.

Growing Segment:
Dating services over the internet report that people who are above the age of 50 are their fastest rising segment. These people are no more interested in bar-hopping as they can now access a huge number of singles of their age through these internet services concerned with dating.

Hence, Baby Boomers consider the concept of online dating extremely convenient. They are less apprehensive about meeting new people over the internet as compared to their earlier generation. Online dating is not a necessity for these people.

According to them, online dating is rather a convenient way to complement other traditional ways concerned with meeting people.

Changing Face Of Dating Services Over The Internet:
Through their honesty and expectations concerning customer service standards, Baby Boomers have changed these dating services over the internet in a big way.

These services have often been criticized for their customer service standards as well as their authenticity regarding the posted profiles is also many times questioned.

Baby Boomers will be satisfied with a high level of customer service and nothing else. Baby Boomers also want these websites to properly post the contact information and seek permission while charging the people with the required fees for the purpose of renewing their membership.

This forces the dating services over the internet towards increasing their customer service standards for the purpose of attracting Baby Boomers as well as their disposable income.

While these dating services will do all possible things for meeting the expectations of Baby Boomers as they form a significant customer base, this will also increase the customer service standards of this industry in general.

These Boomers are also extremely honest and comfortable about themselves. Hence, their profile information is usually true and they expect a similar behavior from others. Also, they are more careful while committing themselves in a relationship.

Honesty as well as increased customer service standards will also benefit the other users of these services and hence, the industry on a whole.

Dating After Divorce: Online Dating Tips



There is one group which got increasingly active in the various dating services over the internet as it became more and more popular. These are Baby Boomers.

Today, it is the fastest rising segment. This may be because of the fact that they are internet frenzy and tech-savvy people having adequate knowledge about using the internet for finding what they desire. They think that a lifetime should never be wasted in making mistakes as well as misinterpretations.

While some of them are logging into these services for just starting over but there are others too who want to finally get committed with someone. These services have no more remained an exclusive domain of recent graduates and college students.

Research has provided the information that these Baby Boomers usually get themselves registered with the mainstream dating services over the internet, especially if they are unmarried whereas dating networks over the internet is rather preferred by the divorced people in this group as these dating networks have a narrowed member definition, given by interests or age.

The requirements which are essential to younger generations like high sex appeal and good looks have been made insignificant by these Baby Boomers. They are rather searching for a partner for growing old with.

Hence, it’s more important to connect with someone with whom they can live in harmony rather than finding someone for clashing and disagreeing with for the rest of their lives. The best thing about Baby Boomers while using these dating services is that no desperation is involved on their part to find a perfect match.

They are more interested in entering the singles arena once again which does not require them to take part in activities like blind dating or bar-hopping.

These dating services also helps these Baby Boomers by providing new hope when their past relationship in on the verge of a divorce. They can pick someone who suits their situations, activities, interests, and preferences like communication skills, like-minded attitude, etc.

But, this should be done hastily for preventing the disappointment of a rebound relationship.

These dating websites over the internet for Baby Boomers employ a huge number of criteria, which may include sex appeal too, but it is not the only one though, for matching two people. Hence, these services help you in giving you the essential information required for deciding that whether or not you are compatible with that other person so that you can lead a happy life with them.

Dating After Divorce: Tips For Grownups



The statistics concerned with successful counseling of marriages are not really encouraging. Couples usually tend to wait until the time things go totally awry before eventually seeking professional help for the purpose of saving their marriage.

Hence, instead of waiting for these issues to blow-up, it is always better to be careful while selecting our partner.

Creating an intentional and intelligent plan to select a partner for life is more reliable than establishing your relationship on risks and chances.

This may not seem very romantic and hence this way of selecting a partner is not yet widely adopted. People justify their decision for not adopting this way by saying that a model can never be created for mature, conscious and aware marriages.

There is one more challenge which is required to be tackled: unconscious thought. Adults have a desire of dating like adolescents.

• They automatically tend to pose like adolescents by marketing their best attributes only while hiding the worst ones.

• All of us have assumptions and unexplored beliefs which continue to stay with us without us even suspecting their existence.

• Most of us have wrong ideas regarding relationships which usually are not very effective.

• We are not sure about the extent to which these relationships control us.

Though people attain maturity with age but when it comes to relating with your partner, they act as teenagers. The male partner desires of having a convenient and uncomplicated physical relationship like their younger years whereas the female partner wants exclusivity and romance.

Despite of their experience, it seems neither of them is mature enough for creating a successful relationship.

Without having the knowledge of how romantic adults relate with one another, these grown ups seem lost in their notions of behaving like adolescents.

Consequently such relationships are often affected by frequent errors, misunderstandings and upsets. Both of them have a desire of getting each other, but they lack the skills required to tackle their individual issues. A responsible behavior would be one in which the partners are absolutely clear and honest about themselves and their desires.

Instead of letting the events forcing you to take repairing action, personal strength and conscious decisions would always yield better results.

Finding ways for resolving the daily challenges in a relationship is an important task for having a happy life. It is upto you to decide that whether your maturity and experience should be used or not.

Dating After Divorce: Getting Started



The experience of dating someone after your marriage has ended in a divorce may be uncomfortable in the beginning. But, you should not feel so intimidated by this.

Trying things which are unknown always scares or discomforts you but this does not mean that you should run away from that. The thought of dating someone can be really appealing to those people who have suffered a setback in their relationship recently.

With practice and patience, your confidence towards dating will grow again.

Prepare:
Preparing yourself mentally is the first thing which should be done for the purpose of allowing new people to enter your life and expand your social avenues. You can consult your single friends for gathering some dating pointers.

As they have been actively meeting or dating people, they can provide ideas regarding this. Consider their opinions for finding the current dating rules. Don’t feel embarrassed about asking these things. After all, everyone has desires and needs within themselves.

Always think positively for the purpose of boosting yourself. Never overly criticize yourself as kindness is rather more important. Don’t feel uncomfortable due to issues like weight, scars, and so on as nobody in this world is perfect.

Instead of mulling about your shortcomings, prefer focusing on your positive aspects. You can always deal with other problems whenever you get ready. As of now, you should only focus on dating. Take the situations one by one, instead of getting overwhelmed by considering the bigger picture, so that it becomes easy to manage them.

Be Appropriate:
Start feeling good about yourself by buying some new and appealing outfits. Instead of having a mindset of shopping for those things which others like, always prefer buying only those things which you are comfortable with.

Don’t pretend to be someone else by wearing those kinds of clothes which you are not comfortable with.

Wear something which is stylish, yet suits your age and personality. Women often resort to sporting high heels and form-fitting like they did when they were younger, for looking attractive once again. They should understand that what looked good back in their younger years does not look good now. They should rather prefer those outfits which are less outrageous and revealing.

Don’t wear heels if you are not comfortable wearing them for saving yourself from the embarrassment due to tumbling over.

Whatever you do, always be honest as pretending to be someone else will never be much useful in the long run.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Dating After Divorce: Advice For The Middle-Aged

It is really difficult to get back to dating people after having reached a certain age, the middle age. The circumstances which lead middle aged people to start dating again are not usually pleasant.

People may resort to doing this to mourn the loss of their spouse through death or divorce. Getting back to dating ways gives you a reassuring feeling that someone is still with you.

Decades may have gone past since the last time you dated but this fact should not deter you to against living an enjoyable.

Feel Comfortable:
The element of romance is forever present in your beating heart. This fact should be realized as soon as possible. Middle aged people are often found to be lacking in confidence for dating someone on account of their appearance.

But, you should not worry about this as nobody out there expects you to have really good looks. You should feel comfortable with the way you look as of now. You may even think about reinventing your look by changing your hairstyle, buying new clothes or getting your body sorted out in the gym.

This phase of life should be considered as a fresh beginning. If looking different makes you feel different then you should definitely try changing your appearance but you should never dislike your present self.

Remember that you are competing against the fitter, gorgeous twenty-something men. You should understand that all middle aged people seeking love will have the same kind of insecurities and hang-ups like you. Feel comfortable about the fact that you have a fairly stable and established life except for the love arena.

Your kids have grown up and so is your experience in life. Always think about these positives for making yourself feel comfortable while entering the dating arena once again.

People who have reached their middle age often feel that they are unwanted due to the “baggage” of losing someone who they loved intensely and also due to the trauma and hurt associated with failed marriages. You should remember that most middle aged men or women who are single today would also have experienced the same misfortunes.

It can be even be beneficial for connecting with someone of your age as both of you would be having a common background.

Be Honest:
You should properly analyze your feelings and emotions before beginning to date again. Be completely sure about what you desire out of this. Be responsible in communicating this fact to him/her.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

How to Make Anyone FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

In "How to Make Anyone Falling Love with You,"you'll explore precisely what will make someone take the tumble--what types of initial eye contact, clothing, body language, first conversations, and first dates ignite the sensation of love. You'll learn when to play hard to get (and when not to), how long you should wait to ask him or her out, and how to make an unforgettable first impression. In addition, the author will teach you how to discover and exude a sense of the deeper qualities the man or woman you have chosen longs for in a lifetime partner. Finally, she demonstrates the subtle techniques for discovering ( and fulfilling) your partner's sexual cravings.

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